darke_phoenixe challenged me to list 10 of my favorite things that start with the letter "B". In no particular order:

1. Basta - Duh. Plus, it sure as hell beats my other two last names. Except people pronounce it wrong all the time. It's not Baa-sta, like a damn sheep. It's like pasta, but with a B.
2. Brownies. Hello yummy-tummy!
3. Blowjobs. Indeed. When the mood strikes I rather enjoy them. Used to go through stages where I had to give them daily (to the hubby, of course! sheesh). TMJ really is a bitch, though.
4. BLOO!!! See icon. Hands down, my all time favorite cartoon ever. Ever. Ever. For reals. And I love me some Family Guy...oh and remember The Tick? Loved that, too. But FHIF is the ultimate laugh stop.
5. Baby's. Can't have anymore of my own and I seem to have had the fever for the past couple of years. I just love to be around them and hold them and smell them (face up).
6. Balloons. I'm a HUGE balloon fan and everyone around me gets one for their birthday. There's just no way one can have a birthday without a balloon. It's like, sacrilegious or something.
7. Birthdays! I hate that people become complacent about the day they entered the world. Birthday's are big deals. We've changed countless lives and had a hand in countless faucets of life. Plus, no one we know would be the same without us so celebrate your big day like you mean it!
8. Baileys!!!!! Oh oh oh...and a friend of mine recently sent me a recipe for Bailey's Brownies. Yah, take that double does of "B" love!
9. Books. Love books, but I've found myself to be very particular on what I like to read. For the past couple of years I seem to only be drawn towards books related to Southern Asia and the Middle East or anything relating with those cultures. Examples: Life of Pi by Yann Martel, The Covenant by Naomi Ragen, philosophic author, Khalil Gibran, The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini, Crescent and The Sacrifice of Tamar by Diana Abu-Jaber, The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy and The Blue Bedspread by Raj Kamal Jha . I'm reading a book right now called God is Dead. Basically God takes human form in a Darfur woman, come to make apologies to the Sudanese, but then gets killed.

When God is gunned down, news of His death spreads quickly around the globe and provides the jumping-off point for the subsequent short story–like chapters that reveal what happens in a post-God world..

It's....interesting to say the least.
As soon as it becomes available at our library I'm dying to get my hands on A Thousand Splendid Suns also by Khaled Hosseini.
10. Big Booty's! Speaking truly from the heart of my own big derrière on this one, I love a small waist and big fat romp on a woman.

Tagging: If you want in on the meme, hit me back with a message and I'll toss a letter your way.

"I have a can of chicken breast and I am so not afraid to use it!" - me, in response to Charlie's attempt to hose me down with the sink sprayer thingymabob last night.

"If I were walking along and found a spiderweb with words in it, I would freak out." - Charlie, after we had all found some spiderwebs along a bridge with all kinds of dead bugs trapped among them. Obviously, this is in reference to Charlotte's Web.

"Yah, especially if it said, 'You're next' on it!" - Adrian's hilarious response to Charlie's above statement. Almost pee'd my pants on that one.

Shoot. there are a couple of more but my spacey brain forgot already. That's alright. Spring cleaning fever has crawled up my arse big time today and I'm on a mission to do some major damage (the positive kind).

Peace out.

ps. I got my hairs cut the other day. Swing bob. Much cuter than the momsy style I was trying to grow out. I need to just accept that long hair is not me, never has been me, never will be me. I'm not made for that kind of hair and even if I were, my hair is a defiant bitch and refuses to grow. Anyway, I feel much better with the sassy do.

I just got a voicemail from tjsvixen (I hate that I missed it! I had the tunes turned up really loud and didn't hear my phone in the other room).

Anyway...she's on her way to labor & delivery. She's not sure if it's the real deal yet, but based on what she's experienced this morning, it could be! How frickin' awesome would it be if little Alexandria made her debut on February 29th?!!!

I'll keep ya posted if I hear anything more or if it's a false alarm I'm sure Celeste will be back later to post about her little princess teasing!
:o)

mrs_bananahead has left the building. Forever.

just_jenn is now me. I know I'm a silly goose, but I like it muuuuuch better. It's simple and uncomplicated. Unlike anything remotely like me. Cool.
Plus, it's unrelated to fruit. And that's a bonus.
It's me...as is. Just Jenn.
Take it. Or leave it.

ps. and I promise this is the last time. Hey, I've had my lj for like, I dunno, 5 years or something. You all are lucky I haven't been changing it every season!

mrsblkwod tagged me and being the good girl I am, I did my assignment!

1. Write your name/username
2. Are you left handed or right handed?
3. Write your favorite letters
4. Write your least favorite letters
5. Write, "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog".
6. Tag 6 friends

( Cut to save your friends page. Because I'm nice like that. )

For those of you who might be interested, an Earthhour2008 group was created by a member in another community. Essentially it'll be a group for counting down to the big night, getting tips on living green, sharing inspirational stories on activism, and various topics on environmental issues.

If you care to join, it's earthhour2008

No stupidheads allowed!
It's brand spanking new, so it's a little lackluster. That's why we need more members to livin it up. So if you care about Mother Earth and want a place to talk about it or just get inspired, join dammit!

(might have to click it to see it larger....I drew her a birthday-gram on the driveway)

One of the things I love about her is just how damn cool she is.
She received a very cool necklace from her dad (in England). It's a piece of the Sikhote-Alin meteor, which fell to earth in Russia in 1947.

"Large meteorite falls are rare, about one every ten or twenty years over the whole Earth. One of the most spectacular occurred in 1947, in the Sikhote-Alin mountains of eastern Russia. There were only a few small villages and farms in the dense forests of Sikhote-Alin. Mid-morning on February 12, the calm was shattered by a bright meteor, visible for more than 300 kilometers, that streaked across the sky, shedding sparks and leaving a trail of swirling smoke. An eyewitness painted this impression of the meteor. After it streaked over the horizon, great explosions roared and echoed from the hills, so loud they were heard 100 kilometers away."

And she's in love with it! I don't know many 10 year old girls in this day and age that would give a rats ass about a piece of meteor.
She also got some books (Black Beauty & Little Women), earrings, a Colbie Cailet cd, a puzzle game, thesaurus, new journal and a very cool book called "The Care & Keeping of You". It's an age appropriate book for girls, about girls. Every topic from body size & nutrition, to puberty, periods, bras, teasing, teeth, bad breath....you name it, it's in there. She didn't want to put it down last night. I talk to her about all those things, of course, but sometimes a girl just wants her privacy on such matters. This book is a wonderful tool and I highly recommend it to those of you with young girls.

I think I nearly broke my hip dancing to Flo Rida's "Low". Sadness. This is a testament to my age, no doubt.

Thanks truejabber.

**this is a positively beautiful statement about remembering humanity--even in those who are different than you.**

I've spent the better part of the past 4 days on the couch.
It's a bizarre sickness.
Definitely not the flu.

My guess is some sort of wacky stomach virus. Thankfully, I have not been subjected to the tortures that usually come from stomach woes (read: no living on the commode), but the nausea, good lord. I feel completely drained of all energy and my appetite is neither here or there. Whatever that means. When I am actually hungry, I want only junk food. Yesterday I thought I was on the road to recovery and was soon rid of that thought when the nausea catapulted me into the fetal position in my bed. I've not vomited at all, but I've gagged repeatedly and seem to be completely sensitive to smells. Yes, I know. It does sound like pregnancy. That's simply not possible, so why then, oh why, am I suffering the dreaded all-day sickness? No one else in the family is complaining of any thing.
I have no fever.
No runny or stuffy nose (aside from my usual allergy crap this time of year).
No cough.
No flu typical aches, although I am drained completely.
The head pain subsided.
So it's just the dreaded tummy pains and nausea. It sucks because it makes me not want to do anything and when you've got a family, that's not allowed.
I thought getting dressed yesterday and going to the store would be good for me, but hell no. We were there all of 10 minutes when I felt like I had to crawl into the cart to keep from moving.
It's like a 4 day long hangover.

Oh, and I'm getting a UTI on top of it, I suspect from the drastic cut in my water consumption.

So life is good.
;o)

So those of you whom I have known for years might remember my lj username used to be jabberjenny. Then, being tired of the "jenny" aspect of that name, I decided to change it. Being the sad soul I was at the time, I could come up with nothing more clever than mrs_bananahead. You might remember the story of how I came to that name, and though it was cute at the time, I've grown to hate it.

So....I'll likely be changing my user name, yet a-frickin-gain when taxes come in. It's $15 and an absolute waste, I know, but I honestly can't find my happy place with mrs_bananahead and by golly, that's what lj is about right? RIGHT!

So...suggestions? I was thinking of going back to the original idea, but modifying it to "jabberjenn"
I also like "just_jenn" or "jenn_jenn"
Maybe something completely unrelated to my name?

The fact that I have repeatedly watched this video and watched his interview on Larry King Live and in fact, did NOT change the channel on the XM when this song came on, might be proof of my complete and utter lack of stable mental health. Yeppers, you are officially witness to the demise of any ounce of sanity that I had left.



I dare you to watch it..just once...all the way through and not A)think it is the most absurd bunch of bullshit you have ever laid eyes on and yet B)find it bizarrely catchy.
Dear lord...the round bed of flying saucer love....gets me every fucking time!

I *just* realized that the contacts a dear friend sent to me months ago are Night & Day --meaning, I don't have to take them out at all for up to 30 days. And of course, I've been taking them out every night (habit from 15 years of standard contact use). I already wasted one pair and this morning upon opening a new set I saw the "Night & Day" logo and thought, "hey...I wonder if I can sleep in these?"


DUH.

I said hateful words to C yesterday.

I've been having a hard time reciprocating love, mostly since our big blow up last month (hole in the wall night). I feel..gah, just burned out. It's not that I don't have any love, I do, but it's as if it's not enough anymore because we're still dealing with the same emotional bullshit. Part of me wants so much to grow old with him and I can really see it in minds eye. Another part just wants to move on because I don't want a man that's so damn emotionally volatile. I'm tired of this. Underneath, he has a beautiful soul and really beautiful moments, but most of the time it's an eggshell walk. I want someone who's more happy-go-lucky and energetic/not so lazy. I want someone who adores his children, not just with words, but with involvement. I want someone who's more of a help around the home. I want someone who loves the same things I do, but he's not any of those things and lets face it, after 9 years, likely never will be. He was -once upon a time and that's why I fell in love, but he has changed in unbelievable ways.
I've grown so much as a person since we first met and he's slumped drastically (he'll even admit this). I have also seen myself slump in some areas as a result of being hurt so many times. I'm more cynical, definitely more mean.

Maybe I've grown apart from him.

I have a whole lot of resentment and what he doesn't seem to grasp is that it doesn't go away just because we have a decent day. Anytime he loses his temper or sinks into himself (wanting nothing to do with us) I am catapulted back into all that hurt and I just want it to fucking stop. It never has, though. Supposedly he has an appointment with mental health this month, but I haven't heard about it again and am leaning towards believing that he's not going to follow through.

Something happened the other day and it wasn't a big deal (in the scheme of what's a big deal at our house). As we were coming in from the auditions I walked in first, followed by the kids and one of the kids accidently locked the door on Charlie before he came in. Rather than just knock he started banging profusely and when I opened it I said, "Sheesh. You don't have to knock like that" and his response was, "You don't have to lock the fucking door".
Wow. Out of nowhere.
It's like this all the time and he honestly doesn't see it. He just blows like that instead of being a civil person. I don't get it. Why not knock simply? Why not realize no one did it on purpose? Why not make a joke about it. I joke a lot about everything and he's so damn serious and takes everything as deliberate and malicious. We are polar opposites in many ways and while "they" say opposites attract, I can tell you that I don't like it a single bit.

Anyway, after that moment I went about doing whatever it was I was doing and I thought to myself "It's really over". For some reason that simple little thing made me shut him off inside. I remember standing at the pantry thinking, "This is the moment when I realize it's over. Wow. Over the garage door being locked."

So...that brings me to lastnight. He gave me a hug and a kiss and said I love you and I didn't say it back the way one would normally like to hear it. I know this. Naturally it bothered him and we shard words and then finally I said, "Maybe it's because I don't love you anymore and haven't for some time."


That's some painful shit and I knew immediately that I'd hurt him. I didn't care though. In my mind I thought "he's hurt me so much, he deserves it!". That be the vengeful side of JB. But course, I felt bad later. We didn't talk much. This morning I finally apologized and told him that I shouldn't have said that and I very briefly touched on the fact that I'm struggling and tired and resentful. We couldn't really talk because work and all, but that's where we parted.

He won't get my pain though. He'll see it as coming out nowhere, after all, he didn't yell at anyone yesterday. He thinks each day is a clean slate and it's just not for me...not anymore.

Maybe this is just our cycle and maybe by next month I'll be back in love. Surprisingly, I'm not down. I've been in really good spirits, but I do feel empty on the love front. I feel like I want to set it down and put it on the shelf and not deal with it for a long while. Maybe pick it up later and dust it off and then see if it still works.
That's not fair to him, but then...what he's done to me isn't fair either.
I feel ,sometimes, as if I'd be a happier person and better mom if we were no longer together. Othertimes that thought crushes me to the core.
It's my battle.

Blah.
It's just a stupid stupid cycle and I want off. I want him to want off, too, with me so we can move on, but...yah.

One of the hardest things about having a super-awesome-talented and beautiful child is finding out that other parents have super-awesome-talented and beautiful children, too.

Call backs are today.
She did fantastic, but with all the competition, I just don't know.
150 kids auditioned for 7 roles.
We were there for 3.5 hours. Gah!
I'll find out today if she has a call back and the final casting will be tomorrow. GULP!

That girl was in her element. She's tried the sports thing and the Girl Scout thing, but they were both, meh. She lit up last night like I have never seen her shine before. I think seeing other kids like her really boosted her self image. Theater kids do tend to be "different" and she fit right in. She knows she may not get the part (naturally we discussed all the aspects of auditions, etc.) and this is what she said: "I don't care..I mean, of course I would love to get a part, but I'm just happy for the experience of having my very first audition" and she giggled and laughed and bloomed all night.
I am so frickin' proud of her!

**I belong to the community myhappyhome and today is our show-n-tell Monday.

This is what I posted and I thought I'd share in my own journal because, gosh, there's just so much more you need to know about me! :o)

Here are my show-n-tell Monday goodies (and oooooohh, there's a scandal inolved!)



This is just a small gathering of the Wild Strawberry Wedgewood China ensemble that I inherited from my beloved grandmother when she passed away. I have just about everything, I believe, that was made in that series (throughout the 70's and 80's) including individual ashtrays (seen on the right) and this adorable mini set:



Now....there is a wonderfully scandalous story about just how my grandmother came about this collection and if you're so inclined, here it is ( text )

So now we're riding it out to see if we will in fact be leaving for Houston tomorrow.

School called. Saydra has fever, too. Had to go pick her up, so now I've got both rugrats home.

The kids have not missed a single day of school all year and the one weekend we decide to drive to Houston (for the first time in nearly a year) they both miss school due to illness.

Isn't that something?